The Bubble

For so long the world I have dreamed of was a fantasy that only played out in my head, but since Mummy that fantasy has slowly become real. The utter compulsion to live as a little girl was always reliant on someone looking after me, because to really live as a child requires a parent. In my world there was no compromise, no part time existance and now 2 souls have joined to create this world, a dream world shared. Our world is essentially our bubble, what brings us joy, what is relevant is in our bubble. The rest of the world can go by as fast or slow as it likes for the bubble has its own agenda and that is creating a space where Mummy and daughter can live in their true roles.

There are so many alternative lifestyles out there, so many bubbles. Mine and Mummys is just another bubble floating on the breeze.

I would like just to say a quick shout out to Debbie who sent me the sweetest email. I hope you are reading this, I would love it if you got in-tocuh, I would very much like to share some of you email
x x x

 

Man in the mirror

To truly state what Mummy has done for me would take a lifetime but for this post I can touch on a small part. I have said it before I am sure but I, like many other sissies, have suffered the dreaded man in a dress syndrome, where no matter the little girlie fellings coursing through our veins, no matter the soft feel of panty or nappy, the frillies draping our bodies, there still awaits that look in the mirror that can make a sissy just want to cry. Of course I don’t think any sissy can think they will pass as a little girl, especially those of a more mature standing shall we say (like me), syamatics dictate we are physically men in little girl clothes, however there is a desire I feel for many to be able to picture in that mirror what lays burning in our hearts.

Over the years I had learnt a lot about how sissies see themselves and chatting with adult little girls was invaluable. Mindset, mindset, mindset and letting go. This helped, but it didn’t really click until Mummy drummed it into me, in the nicest possible way of course (sorry humiliation and spanking lovers, my Mummy is kindest personified and besides I am a good little girl!!). Mummy see’s the baby girl inside, it’s as simple as that, she see’s past the shell and see’s Samantha and with her guidance, affirmation and validation she helped me see my true self. So dressing up and looking in the mirror doesn’t phase me, I see me, a little girl, in-fact even in mens clothes I see her.

It’s a joy to behold when you see yourself in that light, I am sure many sissies/adult little girls will testify. It’s about not having hang-ups about life, how it’s not fair, but embracing. Oh how simple lol. But for the sanity of being a sissy it has to be simple. For every sissy out there living their lives to the full, there are a 100, if not more, sitting alone in a room with a cheap wig, dress and dolly, aching to be themselves. And of course there are those many sissies who cannot even dress, cannot be and believe me I still feel lucky to be able to dress even if it is not all the time or when I want to, I still thank the pixies.

I guess what I am saying is that even if you cannot dress, or you feel down because you just look like a man in a dress, that little girl who bounces up and down inside you, trying to burst out, is YOU and she shines through your eyes. You don’t need imagination to see her, just look in the mirror and wait for the twinkle in the eye. That body, that shell is just a protective layer around her, she is pretty, she is full of energy and she doesn’t care if she isn’t in a dress or what he looks like, she just wants to express. Sure she isn’t going to turn her nose up at a pretty frilly dress but as long as she can express everynow and then she will be just fine.

I love being a sissy, I love being a little girl, a baby. I wonder though if after all these years of writing this blog whether the reader would say I have done very little towards my goals, that by now I should be at least meeting other sissies. Does that flash accross the mind? Or maybe you think I am well on the road to a happy life? Or maybe you saw the title of this post and thought there might be something on Michael Jackson!!